When brainstorming, I can't write well. It's impossible. I started this entry cleverly, then gave up and backspaced it. I need the chatty, self-referential tone on me in order to think.

I remember that we're starting in a hospital. She is going to start there, talk about her madness or her blackness or whatever you want to call it. A few things are going to happen at the hospital, maybe, to establish things. Maybe she should have just gotten there, be waiting for some sort of intake. Maybe not. She's at the hospital, a few outside things happen. And she slips into her fantasy life, out of boredom, out of tiredness, out of all of it.

She'll start somewhere familiar. She'll think, the nice thing about coming here is I don't have to be myself. I get so sick of that person I've become. I have freedom from all that here.

I'm seeing a fountain. A glass fountain in a well-kept city square, a fountain of blue glass, pale and water. Opaque navy center, to hide the pipes, but the bit that holds the falling water is a very subtle, very watery blue. She is watching the water move, letting it take her away.

She meets someone. Obviously this is the time for some sort of interesting opening interaction. Someone she hasn't met before, someone more direct and communicative than usual. Something like "So they've taken you." Referring to the outside. No? Maybe. I don't know. "Have you thought about your place here?"

I'm trying to see the scene to see if it gives me any ideas I hadn't thought of. Some sort of thread. Some sort of journey.

I could see people being upset with her or fucking with her inside life because "she" sent them to hospital. But I thought this should be more internal. Maybe that's her introduction to the reality of it all. Some Miss Shirley type or other being all, what is wrong with you? This is not acceptable!

So there's the adjustment period, when she realizes it's real. In the process, maybe she should realize that Something is Not Right. Maybe it should be something like, she's the Authorized Front and she realizes how fucked up that is. Some computery council that is running the Front. And no one else gets to do shit, because they know stuff. And she can't do it all alone.

Maybe that's dumb. I don't know.

So then there would be some sort of fight, some sort of quest, where she tries to upset things. I don't know. It's a start. Really, I'd like to just begin writing before I form it any more. I've got an okay start, and this novel is Supposed to be mediocre.